Didn't See That Coming
From the first time I saw him, I have loved that little boy more every day. He has always loved spending time with me (doesn't every little boy love hanging out with their mom?)...playing ball in the backyard, helping with dinner, laundry, tickling, and reading. He will do anything I ask, and almost always with a good attitude. Because he loves me so much.
Today my heart broke for him. He made a poor choice at school and ended up in the Lead Teacher's office (assistant principal). She wrote him up and he said she quickly threw a piece of paper in his face (the long form maybe?). She showed him the class where IST (in school suspension basically) is, the place he will go tomorrow after he performs in the kindergarten musical. He asked her if he'd be there for "many days or many years." (poor baby!) I got a phone call soon after this occured and agreed that he needed to face the consequence of his actions and go to IST.
When the bus dropped him off at my school, I went out to meet him, my heart still aching for him and his difficult day. He first told me his stomach hurt, and I told him that I knew he'd had a bad day. When we got to my library, I held him and we cried together for a long time. I tried to reassure him and understand the situation from his perspective. I told him about the time when I was in 8th grade and got caught with gum and cried knowing I would have detention after school the next day. I learned my lesson and that was the one and only time I ever got in trouble at school. Let's hope this is it for him. But even if its not, my love for him is the same. I adore that boy.
The woman that had to deal with his behavior today doesn't know the boy that I know. The boy that scours his room looking for toys he can give away to kids who don't have much. The little boy who loves to help with the Offering proclamation at church. The boy who likes to tell me he has a suprise for me and gives me the biggest hug and kiss he possibly can. The little boy who I got to see come alive over the past 3 years. I love that boy so much.
I know that he's not perfect. He is "all boy" and loves a good adventure. Running, playing hard, and getting dirty is just what he does.
I don't know what else to say other than I understand a little better how God must feel when we have to walk through difficult consequences because of poor choices we make. How it must hurt His heart to see us go through things we've opened ourselves up to! He loves us anyways, and knows we'll make more mistakes in the future. His mercies are new each morning, great is His faithfulness.
I pray that like God's love for me inspires me to sincerely repent for the wrong choices that I make and strive for a more holy life, my love for Cruz will inspire him to seek goodness.
Now, I need to wipe my eyes and get some rest! I will be spending much of tomorrow praying for my sweet little man.
Today my heart broke for him. He made a poor choice at school and ended up in the Lead Teacher's office (assistant principal). She wrote him up and he said she quickly threw a piece of paper in his face (the long form maybe?). She showed him the class where IST (in school suspension basically) is, the place he will go tomorrow after he performs in the kindergarten musical. He asked her if he'd be there for "many days or many years." (poor baby!) I got a phone call soon after this occured and agreed that he needed to face the consequence of his actions and go to IST.
When the bus dropped him off at my school, I went out to meet him, my heart still aching for him and his difficult day. He first told me his stomach hurt, and I told him that I knew he'd had a bad day. When we got to my library, I held him and we cried together for a long time. I tried to reassure him and understand the situation from his perspective. I told him about the time when I was in 8th grade and got caught with gum and cried knowing I would have detention after school the next day. I learned my lesson and that was the one and only time I ever got in trouble at school. Let's hope this is it for him. But even if its not, my love for him is the same. I adore that boy.
The woman that had to deal with his behavior today doesn't know the boy that I know. The boy that scours his room looking for toys he can give away to kids who don't have much. The little boy who loves to help with the Offering proclamation at church. The boy who likes to tell me he has a suprise for me and gives me the biggest hug and kiss he possibly can. The little boy who I got to see come alive over the past 3 years. I love that boy so much.
I know that he's not perfect. He is "all boy" and loves a good adventure. Running, playing hard, and getting dirty is just what he does.
I don't know what else to say other than I understand a little better how God must feel when we have to walk through difficult consequences because of poor choices we make. How it must hurt His heart to see us go through things we've opened ourselves up to! He loves us anyways, and knows we'll make more mistakes in the future. His mercies are new each morning, great is His faithfulness.
I pray that like God's love for me inspires me to sincerely repent for the wrong choices that I make and strive for a more holy life, my love for Cruz will inspire him to seek goodness.
Now, I need to wipe my eyes and get some rest! I will be spending much of tomorrow praying for my sweet little man.
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